I didn't actually watch the VMA's last night (heard they sucked as usual) but I did hear about the best news of the evening - Beyoncé revealing her gorgeous little baby bump post-performance for the whole world to see! God, didn't she look radiant? I mean, the sequined jacket was whatevs, but that glow & smile was untouchable! Her and Jay definitely make for my favorite Hollywood couple, I've believed in them since day one! Can't wait for this kid to be born...hopefully it won't be a little shit! In case you missed the big moment, here it is below at the end of Love On Top...

(GOD LADY GAGA, WAY TO FUCKING RUIN IT AT THE END!)

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OUT: RETARDED ON THE RED CARPET / IN: SUBTLY SEXY SHOW-STOPPERS

Oh Nicki, enough is enough you poor, clueless girl! I mean, I can imagine that it must be intimidating trying to dress above everyone else in Hollywood - especially with heads like GaGa running the show - but excess simply isn't the way. Haven't these women ever heard of 'less is more'? And I don't mean they should leave the house naked either, but homegirl literally looks like a big ass Doodle Bear. Not sexy, or cool, or ground-breaking - just looking at her gives me a migrane.

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I'm actually starting to get pretty excited about this weekend, seems like it's going to be really crazy and exciting! Remember that movie Hard Rain? I always kind of wanted to live through some shit like that, just like floating atop a raft along Myrtle avenue, watching the rats scramble to reach high ground. Sounds scary, but how epic would that be?! The Dillz and I are reluctantly going to the store tonight so we can stock up on water and munchies, although I'm still standing by my belief that this isn't gonna be all that bad. In any case, you're gonna need these...

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God, this brings back so many good memories! R.I.P fuzzy feather-tipped pens & vinyl mini's!

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I don't understand why every New Yorker and their Mom is so fucking shook of this hurricane that we're supposed to be seeing tomorrow, but I've been getting hit up by friends/fam non-stop asking if I've stocked up on food and water yet. Like, chill everybody! Not that I think I'm stronger than nature, but look at NY's record of getting seriously damaged by storms like these. Generally us city folk get sprinkled and gusted on a little bit but then we're good, so I'm totally chilling right now. I mean, I have put in the emergency call to my pot dealer - imagine going without for a whole rainy weekend?! - but other than that, I think I've got everything covered. Plus tomorrow is Leah's birthday - HAPPY BIRTHDAY HEAD BITCH, WE LOVE YOU! - so ain't no way this hoe Irene is getting in the way of our good times. Personally, I don't mind crazy weather, never have. I love that stillness that can envelop a non-stop city like NY during storms, where the streets are wide open, just waiting to be braved by whoever is courageous or desperate enough. Overall, I'm simply excited to get a nice cuddly weekend with my boo - loud raindrops crashing against the windows outside, house full of food smells and marijuana smoke inside, just how I like it.

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Damn, this shit is good.

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By now you frequent readers of the blog know that The Coveteur is my bible - a site that somehow fills me with hopeless jealousy yet rattles my creativity all at the same time. I may seem perfectly content strolling the streets in my H&M jeans and Hanes beaters (and I generally am) but deep down inside, a part of me yearns for that closet filled with gorgeous branded box after box of frouffy expensive shit. I blame my French mother - excuse moi Maman! It's like those lucky few displayed on this site are fashion Gods, and people like myself are just the mere mortals that tremble beneath the shadows of their palm-tree-lined estates. Meanwhile I'm simply trying to get my home office to look like more than what it currently is now - a dusty dumpster lounge chair pushed under a cold iron desk with an old, slow ass computer thrown on top. Not ideal working conditions, especially now that I've acquired a few new freelance jobs (woop woop!) including a little daily contribution to Animal New York, peep it. And now, onto the envious shit!

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Now that September is only about a week away, the workload of New Yorkers everywhere is bound to get a little bit hectic - especially for the ladies putting in long hours behind the scenes for this upcoming Fashion Week. After a long day of carrying latte's, sending out invites, and steaming garments until you scald your fingertips off, wouldn't it just be nice to get yourself off? The Duet waterproof USB/vibrator is the ideal merging of business and pleasure, a fairly quiet device which manages to hold up to 16GB of data all while getting *the* job done. And not for nothing but, it's kind of sexy looking. Funding for the project just got approved, so you can start placing your orders, I believe they're to be sold for $75 a pop. Now you can finally sleep with your work - just don't forget to wash it afterwards.

(VIA)

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Remember in old Tex Avery type cartoons, when they'd focus in on a cute little deer sniffing around the woods, and just when you though it couldn't get cuter, the deer turns around and screams something filthy in a crass mans voice? Well, that's basically what this blooper video of Food Network's Sandra Lee is like to me, but way, waaay better. I always knew that homegirl was a total lush, but hearing her mutter "fuck me" is just the icing on the semi-homemade cake. I'm not mad though, at least it's proof that she's not a Stepford bitch, but I hate when peoples personalities are that drastically different in an instant off camera. Creepy. Get your fill before her people somehow track down the video and have it removed - I know Governor Cuomo can't be happy with this!



(VIA FNH)

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I can't say that I've ever had very solid knowledge of what the Houston rap scene is like - East Coast bitch! - but after spending a while checking out Peter Beste's work, I've been completely enlightened. My man has some raw shit in his portfolio, but I absolutely cannot get enough of photography like this. Fuck all the gleaming chains and photoshopped hoes dancing on rented studio sets - I want the real, real shit, the shit that most people aren't allowed to get close enough and see. He's got a bunch of other awesome sets on his site as well, like After Hours & London Grime, I highly suggest you peep.

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